Kevin's Place

My tumblr hit a 100k page loads this week. In thanks for your interest, a vignette from a current work in progress.

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With everyone else, including his room-mate, still in classes, the dorm was quiet when Tyler got back to his apartment. He was sick of essays and study, so he tossed his papers on the desk and stripped, tossing his clothes aside carelessly and making a bee-line for the bathroom. He took a long, hot, shower to try to relax and take his mind off Seong. He slowly raised the temperature and let the water pound on his shoulders until his skin was raw and he’d filled the bathroom with steam. When he finished drying, he was overheated, so he retreated to his bedroom and opened the window slightly to the crisp winter air then slipped into bed and threw the blankets back to enjoy the breeze kissing his body. The sheets were cool to the touch, and he let himself relax, closing his eyes and letting his mind clear. He lay quietly for a few minutes sorting through about a hundred random things, from classes and career, to Seong. His cock twitched.

A breeze tickled him, making him aware of his skin and causing him to run his hand down his chest and belly, enjoying the smoothness under his hands, with just a hint of stubble here-and-there because he hadn’t shaved in a couple of days. He wondered if Seong had chest hair, deciding it was probably naturally smooth from his Korean heritage, or possibly carrying a fine soft down. He pictured the soft bronze skin surrounding Seong’s rich brown eyes when he’d helped Tyler to his feet the other day. Tyler ran his hand over his chin, feeling the stubble that had already begun to form in the few short hours since his shave. He moved his hand up to feel his damp hair, short cut, blonde, fine, uniform in every respect, he never had to do anything but dry it. He figured it must be a pain to have hair like Seong, always sticking out in a dozen different directions, yet there was something—alive about it. Dark, silky black, completely out of control, but framing his face in a way that drew attention to it like Tyler’s never would. He pictured the mysterious mark on the back of Seong’s neck; it had to be a tattoo, calling attention to the skin, challenging the viewer to notice the smooth coppery canvas it decorated.

Tyler opened his eyes and pulled the pillow up under his head so he could look down at the body he’d inherited from his Slavic ancestors, skin, pale, his slight tan of last summer nearly gone, unmarked in any way, plain. He looked at his cock, slightly darker than his belly, with a darker ring where he’d been cut. He wondered if Seong had a foreskin. He’d always wanted a foreskin, coveting one of his own whenever he thought about them or noticed one in the change room or showers. He ran his hand up the length of his semi-hard cock, pulling the skin up to try, unsuccessfully, to cover the head. It worked, kind-of, when he was soft, but with even a semi he could barely manage to cover a third of the head. He pictured it fully enveloped, warm and concealed as nature intended, plenty of loose skin left over the top, soft and silky.

He closed his eyes again, his right hand taking a firmer hold of his now lengthening cock and began to massage, the left gripping the skin at the base, shaved as smooth as his chest except for a small, carefully trimmed, patch above. He squeezed the base and massaged the shaft, imagining his ex-girlfriend was giving him an all-too-rare blow job. The image shifted and he pictured Seong’s lips, full, rich, and dark, turning up at the corners in a sly smile when he looked back in class this morning. He removed his left hand and brought it up to run the tips of his fingers over his own lips. His right hand gripped tighter, stroking, rubbing pre-cum up over the sensitive head, sticky, slippery, friction sending shivers up his spine. From Seong’s mouth his tongue barely emerged to run across his bottom lip as it had in the hall earlier. His left hand gripped the base again, squeezing under his balls, his right pumping faster, sweat beading on his forehead. His breath became more rapid and shallow, synchronizing with the slapping sound. The imagined tongue stuck out further, running down his chest, across his belly. He squeezed his thighs together tightly, his sac shrinking and pulling up toward him, his hand flying faster and faster as he pictured the tongue running over the head of his cock, leaving a shiny trail of spit behind. His balls pulled in tight, the skin taught and firm, he grunted and froze, holding his breath as his balls and cock spasmed and went off like a gun, shot after shot of hot cum streaking his chest and belly with hot liquid. His breath flew out in a rapid sigh, deflating his straining lungs, and his whole body relaxed as a warm feeling spread slowly throughout.

He lay there for a couple of minutes, letting lethargy take over, until the cool air began to create goose pimples on his arms and chest. He stirred himself long enough to grab his underwear from the floor beside his bed and clean up, then pulled the quilt over his body and fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.

When I come through the door, andy is waiting on his knees, naked, blindfolded, head bowed, just as I told him to be. The slight twitch of his head and shiver betrays that heard me move. I put my hand on the back of his neck and press him forward into a crouch, his ass naked, exposed. I slide my hand under his chin and grip his throat, turning his face toward me. I lean close and slide the cane across his back, ass, thighs, whispering in his ear, “This is going to hurt, slave, not as much as I’d like it to, but enough to get me through the night.”

He swallows, his adam’s apple pulsing under my fingers, and whispers “Yes, Sir.”

I strike, quickly, firmly, relishing the twitch in his throat as he tries unsuccessfully to suppress a gasp. The blows are hard and fast, reddening his once-creamy flesh to a brilliant bloom in seconds. He is as still as he can be; not perfectly, for the pain is too much, but better than any boy I’ve ever caned before. And as hard, his dick sticking straight out under his naked body, oozing a trail of pre-cum onto the floor. I fill with pride and pleasure that I’ve brought him so far that my pleasure can bring him such pleasure.

Tears are seeping from behind the blindfold, his face covered in sweat. I toss the cane aside and open my fly, tugging my cock out of my pants without removing them, my clothing rubbing harshly against this raw, naked flesh. I grab his shoulders and plunge inside furiously, hard, rough, just the way he likes it. The heat of his red flesh spurs me to greater urgency as I use his ass for my pleasure. He squeezes me, milking me, giving me his all while drawing his own pleasure form my use. My cock is on fire inside him, swelling and rubbing, the friction spreading heat through both of us, Our breathing shortens and speeds up in unison as we fly toward the edge. “Not yet, boy” I caution.”

My boy knows me well. Knows how much it pleases me to delay his pleasure. He needs to go off, but waits, like the slave he is, for Sir’s pleasure, biting his lips and locking his muscles to keep himself from spilling too soon. It’s hurting him to delay, I feel the tension in his guts as he squeezes at me in desperation, using ever trick he knows to get me to cum. I intensify my strokes, pushing harder and lifting him when I bottom out, knowing how much it hurts him, how good it hurts him. I ponder if it will be more fun to punish him for cumming too soon, or to let him off tonight. Before I can decide, fate takes the choice, I feel him slipping over the edge and convulsing as he sprays on the floor under us. I let myself go, flooding his ass before he can finish, but far enough behind that he knows there’s no getting out of it today. He’s in trouble.

I slip out of him, panting, and reach for the cane. He gives a slight sob of mingled fear and pleasure as I slide it across his back again.

(Inspired by slaveandy)

If you haven’t already seen it, you may wish to read Dominating a Fagg: Part One - Finding the Fagg

If you are reading this, presumably you have acquired a fagg, and are interested in getting the most out of your new possession. Once you have clearly identified and made the fagg yours, it’s important to perform a little routine maintenance in order to get the longest and best possible use out of it before replacing it. While the fagg may not be as inherently valuable as something like an Xbox, mp3 player, or even a good cigar, it nevertheless can be costly and time-consuming to replace. You once again face the risks associated with identifying a new fagg, and there can be significant inconvenience in going without while you acquire a new one. It is, therefore, best to avoid any chance of it going wild and becoming tempted to look for another Man to serve, or failing early due to inadequate maintenance. It is essential to remember that unlike Men, a fagg has no natural inclination to participate in sports or get regular exercise or sex to help sublimate its tensions. While they really only have a couple of muscles that are useful, you need to keep them exercising and active or you may face all kinds of health and behavioural problems in the future. Through all of this, you have to remember the key point, that the fagg needs to serve you, and it will be most happy and useful if you allow it to serve via more than simply opening its holes to you.

While having your cock buried balls-deep in a fagg’s ass or throat is satisfying, the early stages of maintaining your fagg can be quite difficult and annoying. Unless you are taking on an experienced fagg, it won’t always have the intellect to understand your requirements immediately. The first stages of isolating it from society for its safety can be confusing and frustrating for both of you, as the fagg struggles to understand that it can’t just go around talking to humans and deciding what to say or eat. It may forget that is no longer posing as a Man, and may actually stand at urinals beside Men, forcing them to take a chance on seeing its pathetic junk. You also may find its initial excitement at being permitted to serve a Man may lead to poor control, and can manifest in such mistakes as the fagg unexpectedly peeing on the floor. Unlike most animals, rubbing the fagg’s nose in its piss as a correction is frequently counterproductive, as it is as likely as not to simply become more excited at having piss on it, leaving you with piss and cum to clean up.

In these early stages it will still be confused by years of hiding its nature among Men. It needs to unlearn years, or even decades of bad habits like jerking off for pleasure. Despite its best intentions, during those initial days, the fagg can be easily set back by accidentally playing with itself. You’ll need to discourage it from touching itself for a while, which can be assisted by requiring it to sit when it needs to urinate. This reminder that it should have no reason to touch its prick is particularly effective in the semi-public environment of gyms and open-stall public toilets, where expecting the fagg to sit with its legs spread wide as it urinates has the added advantage of offering it a little of the public humiliation that it craves so deeply.

You should not underestimate the importance to your fagg of family and friends. They play a pivotal role in every life, and the fagg needs to understand where you fit within that relationship. When you first take on a fagg, you will need to ease into things. Start by encouraging the fagg to invite its friends and family over for a meal. When they have arrived, and been made comfortable, you may find that the fagg becomes anxious about whether its service will be noticed or that you may be annoyed by its family and chose to get rid of it. To allay some of its concerns, you can excuse yourself and the fagg to tend to things. At this point, allow the fagg to open its fly so that you can jerk a load of fresh cum inside its pants to help it remember your smell and feel during the meal. In addition to helping transition the fagg to full-time service, such a social function also gives you an opportunity to assess the suitability of its family members as casual sex partners, and to get a feel for how much money the family has for filling your later needs. Be very careful about fucking the fagg’s parents. That should be reserved for places where the fagg won’t find out, to reduce the chance of resentment on the fagg’s part. Under no circumstances should you let the fagg see you fucking its dad, as it will almost certainly become jealous of both of you, leading to a huge scene and threats of suicide.

If the fagg is going to feel safe and comfortable, it will need to you to take charge. Have it give you all its passwords, so you can change them for its safety, otherwise it won’t know when it’s OK to do things like reply to emails, update its family via Facebook, or ask them for more money. It can be tempting to have it work on your dick while you’re online chatting with its sister or mom, but you should avoid that, at least at the beginning. To keep things going smoothly, you may need it to answer questions in a hurry when you’re chatting with its family, and there’s no point interrupting a blowjob so it can tell you what the fuck its mom is whining about, or what you (acting as the fagg) should say next to get the sister to think you give a fuck so she’ll call you up and offer to put out on the weekend. It can be annoying to spend so long without your dick in it, but that part will get easier, as eventually you’ll have gotten tired of nailing the various family members, and you’ll finish getting what you can financially from its family so that you can just break off all contact with them.

When taking control of a fagg for your use, there are a whole new set of considerations to take into account when acquiring new possessions. While the broom won’t give you any trouble if you replace it with a vacuum cleaner, nor the sink or dishrag when you get an automatic dishwasher, acquiring such equipment once you have a fagg will take on a whole new set of potential problems. The fagg may be jealous of the other equipment, and worried that you are considering selling or donating it to a charity shop. If you are fortunate, this will manifest as renewed determination the slave’s part to fill your needs, but, as often as not, you will need to make some adjustments to keep the fagg running smoothly. Such equipment will free up some of its time, and to compensate for that, you may be forced to fuck it a few more times a week, or at least allow it to give you a handful of extra blowjobs, to keep it from getting bored and out of sorts. Added correction will likely be necessary, and this is a good opportunity to remember that the fagg likes to be hit and used roughly. Presumably by now you’ll have figured out whether it responds better to a back-hand to the face, knee to the balls, or a kidney punch, and can correct appropriately. You can also improve the introduction of new equipment into the home by allowing the fagg to use it, thus giving it an opportunity to imagine that it is in control of the new equipment, and possibly even more valuable than the other property, as unlikely as that may be.

At the earliest convenience, you should simplify the fagg’s life by having it turn over access to its bank account and credit cards. Taking care of its money is often a difficult task for faggs, and trying to do so while properly serving a Man is likely to result in it wasting money on things other than your wants, so getting early control of its finances frees it from having to worry about your bills if ends up out of town or hospitalized for a while because it forced you to be aggressive in correcting its behaviour. Having you in direct control of its accounts also frees it from having to worry when about its parents wondering why it always wants cash instead of a cheque when they are helping out.

Early in the fagg’s training, it may make a few mistakes. After being sent to buy snacks or beer, occasionally, it may get confused (from being allowed to associate freely with Men in the past) and it may ask for money. While this can’t be tolerated in the long run, when there are other people around, you need to maintain your cool for its sake. Having to be corrected in front of others can set back its training. Give the fagg a light cuff on the back of the head, as you scuffle your hand through its hair like it’s a dog, then say something like “yeah, like money’s what you want” and then walk away. Of course, if you are alone with it, it won’t be so worried about making a mess in front of others, so you can simply drag it into the tub, or a safe, easily cleaned corner, and piss on it, saying “Here’s your ‘money’, fagg.” As it shows better and better responses to the correction, you can reward it by prying its jaw open and spitting in its mouth.

One powerful way to keep your fagg motivated is to remind it that it gets your cock only because you permit it. If it’s been giving you any trouble, deny it your cock. Allow it to watch while you jerk off without letting it touch. As much as it may pain you to deny it in this way, you have to be firm. If you weaken and let it suck your load out, it will not have learned the lesson properly and will feel disappointed in itself for days afterward, affecting its operation. If it seems to take well to the correction, you can be a hero by letting it lick your cum up off the floor, or suck it out of its shirt afterward. Aside from such correction, allowing the fagg to act as a cum rag any time you want to jerk off in general, will help your actual cum rags last a little longer between washing. You may even be able to do away with them altogether except a few as security rags when you have to leave the fagg by itself overnight.

You can save money by having the fagg buy everything for you. You can save more of its money for things you want by letting it substitute. A perfect example, as long as it’s good at keeping its mouth clean, you can let it clean your ass and then it only needs enough toilet paper for itself. If particularly short of cash you can do away with toilet paper altogether and have it wipe itself with its hands and lick itself clean.

The fagg is going to need constant reinforcement that it is adequate to serve you. Faggs are generally insecure, and will need steady acknowledgement by you that they are being useful. A constant sharing of you cum and piss will go a long way toward helping it understand that it is being useful. You can easily make your day to day life a part of this maintenance. If you’re big into online gaming, or like watching movies and sports, you can cut down on time lost to breaks by having it crouch between your legs and hold your cock in its mouth throughout, so you can piss without interrupting your activities.

You can both reward the fagg and get a bit more sleep by having the fagg sleep on the floor near your bed most night, so if you need to piss at night it is close at hand. The floor should be easy for it to clean, because if the fagg is slow to get up when you need to piss in the night (or just because you want to), it is will expect you to hold it down by putting your foot on its throat or face then piss all over it and its bedding.

When caring for your fagg, remember that it has a powerful need to be humiliated. There are some specific things you can do to fill that need and help keep it working smoothly.

There will be times when you have to have people present who don’t understand how badly the fagg needs to serve you. You will have to train it to pretend it is a person during those times, to avoid others asking it questions that may cause it anxiety. Faggs can easily start to feel lost during the times when you have people over and it is unable to directly serve you constantly. When you have guests in front of whom the fagg is not permitted to serve, make sure that it gets at least one bottle of your piss at some point during the night, so it understands that even though you aren’t using it visibly, you still understand its needs.

Once you’ve decided that you’ve got all you can out of its family and friends, plan a special supper to start the practice of isolation. When the meal is ready, pull its plate aside to get it “that special sauce it likes.” Return the plate a few minutes later with a nice load on top of the meal. Make sure you bring it close enough to the guests that they can smell your special sauce. As you set it down, comment “Sorry it took so long, but it always takes a while to get it up when I’m surrounded by faggs.”

Once in a while, when you let it lay on on the floor while you’re watching TV or gaming, press your foot hard against the fagg’s groin and allow it to hump itself against your foot until it cums. It’s perfectly fine to look disgusted while it’s doing so, but try not to kick it in the balls hard more than a couple of times a month or it may start to limp and other people will ask it embarrassing questions.

Like women, faggs respond well to surprise treats. There are some treats that are easy and inexpensive to provide for your fagg:

• Every once in a while, while the fagg is sleeping, be nice and take a few minutes of your time to jerk off and spray cum on its sleeping face and pillow. It will especially appreciate it if you can land some in its nose or eyes.
• Let it buy itself a gift. It may get special joy if you permit it to buy itself a butt plug to wear to work or when it has a family dinner, or, if you are feeling really generous, let it buy itself a cage for its pathetic prick, so it won’t have to worry about getting hard and making a mess on the furniture when you’re out.
• After you fill the fagg’s ass with a load, you’ll typically want to have it clean up before leaving for work, but if you do so all the time, you’ll just be causing resentment. Once in a while, say on casual Fridays in its workplace, Allow the fagg to keep your cum inside it all day to remind itself that it has actually found a real Man that is willing to fuck it. It will get hot all day knowing that while it is talking to co-workers and bosses your hot load is cooking inside it or running down its legs.
• if you’re fagg has been particularly good, or perhaps for its birthday, give it a special weekend by consuming nothing but eggs, beer and popcorn and allowing it to spend the night with its face against your ass. Being allowed to be near a Man’s stinking ass will leave it in ecstasy.

Regular, unexpected, facials are ideal for helping the fag feel connected to the Man that is using it. A surface application of cum to its face has a variety of benefits, from reinforcing the smell of the Man (through activation of its humiliation lobe) to refreshing and invigorating its complexion. While this is difficult to carry out in public, the creative top can soon find a number of public or semi-public places where he can push the fagg to its knees long enough to dump a quick load on its face. An added bonus to this is that keeping a careful eye out for strangers that look like they want to lick you fagg’s face will give you some possibilities if you ever need to replace it quickly or augment its service.

Don’t be stingy with your fagg. Share. If your buddy is sick, send the fagg over to give him a blowjob and maybe clean up the place and do a little shopping for him. You’ll be helping your buddy and making your fagg feel more useful. Just remember that if you’re going to share your fagg with a sick buddy, you’re being really generous, ‘cause you’ll want to do without for a couple of weeks until it gets better, or you’re sure it hasn’t picked anything up.

Your fagg will be in constant fear that it might do something that makes you look bad, causing you to toss it out for a new one. One way to overcome part of that is to get rid of all of its old clothes, keeping only those things that are completely drab and dull, or that compliment your existing wardrobe, or that you will be wearing yourself. By making it unappealing, you will be showing your fagg that you aren’t planning to sell it.

One of the easiest ways to cater to a fagg’s incessant need for humiliation is to occasionally permit it the privilege of serving other Men. An excellent option is to locate a bar or club that will accept your slave as an additional urinal for the use of any Men on the premises. Failing that, perhaps a private home can be found that is on a busy route and will be willing to permit the fagg to serve as a urinal in the yard or back alley. If you haven’t been careful about doing this from the start, you may find that the fagg has the misguided notion that it serves you solely, and/or, may even think it has some control over who it serves. If corrective punishment doesn’t clear that up immediately, you can tell it that the alternative is that it will be expected to serve females orally. That is usually enough to cause any fagg to gag and immediately cease all disobedience.

Faggs can be quite needy, and a regular dose of bondage and hard sex helps them to relax and be more comfortable in their role. The excitement of fear and pain will go a long way toward raising their heart rate and respiration, especially important for faggs that are incapable of participating in sports and athletics. The calming benefits of oxygen deprivation are especially handy in keeping it relaxed for easy penetration. While your fagg will probably want to be strangled regularly, and there is great benefit to the fagg in permitting it to pass out from lack of oxygen a few times a month, allowing it to do so too often can have an undesirable effect on intelligence that may render it unfit to serve.

We all have a tendency to get slack with our faggs, and there is a real danger of this leading to them figuring out that it is possible for them to cum simply by playing with themselves. That can lead to all kinds of problems like surliness and dereliction of duty. Soon you’ll find faggs running around in the street with dildos in their ass pumping their pricks and spraying their filth on car tires and fire hydrants.

It’s important to remember that it should never have a hard cock unless it’s because a Man is fucking its throat or ass. No matter how good it is at chores, waving its hard fagg-prick around should never be allowed. If the fagg can’t control its dirty prick and can’t afford to buy itself a chastity device, you may need to give it a few swift kicks in its pathetic balls before it learns to keep its prick under control.

Faggs must not start to imagine that they hold a special place in your home or heart. It will make them terribly insecure if they think that you care about anything but their holes and what they can do for you. Faggs have been known to become despondent and commit suicide over fear that a Man had been ruined into thinking it had some inherent value.

One essential part of Maintaining Your Fagg is making sure it understands that it is simply a convenient set of holes and a servant. One of the best ways to make sure it doesn’t start to think it holds some special place is to befriend a local prison guard. Then, on an as-needed basis, you can turn your fagg over (with others of its kind) for temporary use by the guards and by inmates that are getting aggressive during their incarceration. The prison gets a lowering of tensions within the confines, you get to deliver an important lesson to your fagg that helps it feel better about itself, and the guards and inmates get a chance to blow off some steam and testosterone on a target that won’t complain or sue the system over excessive force. A win for everyone!

At the end of the day, it’s important to remember that you are doing the fagg a favour when you permit it to serve you. The fagg has an overwhelming need to feel useful. That comes naturally for the Man, who is useful simply by virtue of letting faggs and women have access to his cock and cum and by allowing them to do things for him. It’s much more difficult for a fagg to find a place in the world. Society understands the woman who needs to serve a Man, but doesn’t really give a fuck about the fagg’s similar need. In most settings, even if it finds a place to serve, perhaps as a faceless, numbered cog in some corporate machine, there will be no sense of worth for the fagg. Finding a Man that is willing to let it do what it needs to do, and who will appreciate it properly by expecting more, can be an enormous relief to the fagg, bordering on a religious experience. Allowing the fagg to have your cock in its throat or cunt is perhaps the greatest thing of which a Man is capable.

You are a Man. Each time you kick a fagg in the nuts or deliver a kidney punch to provide correction, every time you allow a fagg to choke on your cock until it passes out; and each time you not only allow a fagg to have your precious load in its dirty cunt, but even allow it to put its stinking mouth on your dick afterward to clean it off, you are proving that you are among the very best of the best. The sheer generosity of letting a fagg serve your needs is a priceless gift, and Men who allow faggs to touch and care for them deserve to be worshipped for their selfless gift to the world.

—

The above article is parody, and not intended to offer real advice. It is Copyright 2012 by Kevin Shea. Tumblr users are free to repost it on tumblr.com as long as they keep the entire article intact, including this disclaimer and notice of copyright. You are expressly forbidden from altering the article or presenting it as coming from another person. For any uses of this article, outside of tumblr.com reblogs, please contact me for permission at i.like.it.rough@gmail.com

(Inspired by slaveandy)

Watch for the follow-up article, Maintaining Your Fagg, coming later in February 2012.

This essay presupposes there are two kinds of people in the world:
1) Those who fuck (Men)
2) Those who get fucked

Women are pretty easy to categorize in this. Almost all of them like to get fucked, and the only thing you need to be good at is figuring out:
    a) at what stage they are of receptivity, and
    b) what is the best angle of approach.

For men, though, there is more involved as they need to first be separated out into:
    a) Men (Males who like to fuck), and
    b) Faggs.

Since trying to fuck a fellow Man leads to a lot of pain and grief for everybody, telling them apart is an essential skill.

If you’re a Man, and fortunate enough to be able to tell a fagg at a glance, your life is easy. Any time you spot a fagg, it will certainly want you to use it, so you’ve got it made. If, on the other hand, you aren’t able to tell every fagg at a glance, you need to know and understand the signs. Faggs, by nature, need to serve Men, and they are constantly throwing off signs that work together to tell you if you’ve found a good fuck. Some of the signs are present all the time, while others will need to be encouraged through the use of bait. It’s important, when baiting a potential fagg, to remember that the key is escalation. Even a full-on fagg won’t want to be seen as too easy, and will be afraid that you’re just a fellow fagg interested in exposing it in order to remove it from competition. Moving too quickly is likely to drive it in to hiding and cause you more work in the long run. You need to identify it, then slowly cultivate it, working toward the day when it finally understands just how lucky it is, as you take its ass and truly make it yours.

When identifying a fagg, it helps to remember that faggs need to serve men who like to fuck, and they really can’t help themselves, it frequently causes them to give themselves away. In general, if you’re a guy who likes to fuck, spotting the Fag is going to be easy. Faggs will be drawn toward you, and will have trouble resisting you, making the whole thing smoother and faster.  It will constantly be looking for reasons to be near you, to help you, and especially an opportunity to touch a man that likes to fuck. Some key markers are

• In Public:

Brushing against you in passing, when there was lots of room to avoid it. When passing in hallways and public spaces, the fagg is always looking for Men of breeding age, and will take every available opportunity to get a good sniff at a guy to see if it can detect Man pheromones.

Sitting close enough that its legs end up touching yours, especially if your skin is exposed, so that it can imagine you are actually touching it on purpose. In extreme cases, the fagg will shiver whenever its clothes or skin come in contact with yours.

Sitting at your feet, so that it’s shoulders touch your knee or thigh. Often it can’t resist the urge to let its fingers brush against your feet, socks, or footwear, in an attempt to imagine what it would be like if you ground your foot against its fagg junk or kicked it.

If you are uncertain whether the touch is accidental, or a fagg touch, you can often trap it by feigning sleep to see if it sniffs at you or licks you. If it is desperate enough, you may, by feigning that you are passed out, be able to get it to dry-hump your leg in a desperate attempt to imagine you allowed it to serve you.

In social situations, if you actually have to move a few inches to grab a handful of chips, or a piece of pizza, the fagg will leap up, even from the other side of the room, to get it for you, frequently using it as an excuse to sit near your feet in hopes of physical contact. You can also try inviting it to a party, and asking it to supply the booze, then see if it actually asks for some money. Or have booze at the party, but not enough. The fagg will always give itself away by offering to go get more, and in both cases will bring back lots extra in hopes of being treated as one of the guys.

If you have a pretty good idea that you’ve spotted a fagg, but are not certain, once you’ve had a few, fling your leg over the dude, and rest your foot on its groin. If he’s a Man, he’ll do something like give you the finger and push you off, saying things like “Just cause your girlfriend likes wearing a gas mask doesn’t mean the rest of us do.” On the other hand, If it’s a fagg, it will probably get a hard-on, and press back. If it’s particularly desperate, it may start massaging your foot.

When offering to make sure you get home after you’ve had a couple too many, the fagg always gives itself away by supporting you more than the bare minimum to get you home. It may “accidentally” rub its nose in your armpit or groin, or lick you. If you act really drunk, and call it by a girl’s name and mention head, the fagg can’t resist giving you a blowjob which it will use as a fantasy to jerk off to for the rest of its life.

Faggs that find a Man passed out will often try to cop just a little sniff, but they can never resist another, and another, and soon they end up cumming in their pants and fall asleep from exhaustion. If you wake up after heavy partying and find a dude’s face in your pits, crotch or ass, look for signs of cum on it’s crotch, or drool on yours.

A dude that likes to rough-house, but somehow always ends up on the bottom is probably a fagg. It is probably using you, by mentally masturbating to the thought that you are actually fucking it, rather than just fighting with it. Pay careful attention during and after wrestling for prick twitching, adjusting when it gets up, wet spots on its groin, or a glazed look and drool running from its mouth.

• Semi-Private (Men’s Room, Pools, Gyms etc.)

There are several indicators of a fagg that happen in the men’s room, but many of them are difficult to catch, as the fag becomes good at hiding its need at an early age.

Standing at a closer urinal than is appropriate in a men’s room. This can be an especially good clue if it is the kind that normally sits in the stall to piss, and it is obvious it is only standing because of the chance to be near you. An easy escalation here is to step back an inch and let your dick get harder. Other Men will simply ignore you and step away, while the fagg will have no choice but to stare, and may start drooling.

If it accidentally bumps into you while you are pissing, it is probably an attempt to get some on itself. You can test this by spraying a little piss across its legs or hands and watch to see the level of anger verses excited embarrassment. You may need to apologize if it was another Man, but really, if the dude is close enough to bump you at the urinal, he’s probably embarrassed anyway so it shouldn’t escalate. On the other hand, if it’s a fagg, having Man piss on it will short circuit its brain and it will be frozen by a wave of pleasure. If the fagg is particularly worked up, getting some of your masculine piss on it may cause it to twitch and cum on the spot.

When walking away from a urinal where a suspected fagg has been hovering, turn around unexpectedly. You can sometimes catch the fagg licking drops of Man piss off the porcelain of the urinal you were at, running its finger across the piss to lick off, or sniffing at the pool of piss in the bottom. Even if it manages to stand quickly, you can often identify them by looking for signs of pubic hair stuck to its lips or nose.

Watch whether the potential fagg makes a habit of going into a stall right after you leave. Sometimes when you shit you leave a streak of sweat or even a little shit on the toilet seat or porcelain. If it tries to use the stall right after you, it may be hoping to lick the back of the toilet seat to catch whatever you left behind. You can often entice them into the trap by regularly forgetting to flush, in order to leave them bait that is difficult for a fagg to resist. A Man who finds a toilet with a log in it will move to another stall, while the fagg will admire it for as long as it thinks it can before flushing it away, or may just sit above it for a few minutes enjoying the stink wafting up between its legs.

Faggs can also be spotted in locker rooms, either before or after sports, or a the gymn or pool. Try leaving sweaty or streaked shorts, or a pair of particularly fetid socks or runners where it can come across them while you step away to shower or piss. You may find they have moved, or have wet spots on them where the fagg has suckled at your stink and taste. In extreme cases, they may have disappeared altogether. You have to remember this is only a short term loss. Think of it as an investment in future fucks.

Ask it to hold your feet while you do situps, then take your shoes and socks off. Once your feet start to get sweaty under its hands, it won’t be able to resist leaning in for a good sniff, and maybe licking its hands. If you have a quiet corner to yourselves, you can escalate here by laying back and sliding your foot up its thighes and belly, then pressing your heel into its crotch as hard as you can while adjusting so that your dick slips out of the leg of your gym shorts. Once the fagg begins to drool and hump your foot, you’re ready to move on.

Set up a dummy email address, then get chummy with the potential fagg and let slip the address and tell it you have a thing for a particular fetish, maybe you “love seeing asses in purple thongs.” The fagg won’t be able to resist getting a hardon at the thought of a Man looking at a picture of it, and you should get your fist photos within a day or two at most. An escalation here, is to leave a printout of the thong-ass by your bed with a puddle of drying cum on it. The fagg is sure to take that as a good sign, and will start looking for new and intersting ways to offer you its ass.

Sometimes faggs will even participate in sports, in an effort to be close to men, and to appear as one of the guys in hopes of getting to touch you. If you suspect a fagg is involved in your game, you can try maneuvering to a point where your sweaty pit is near its face. A fagg can’t resist a sweaty pit, and if pressed hard enough will lose control and will have to stop everything to nuzzle your stink. Once it has your pit-juice on its face, it belongs to you. Be aware, though, that many faggs find deodorant unpleasant, so if you are hoping to catch a fagg this way, you shouldn’t do anything that will cover your natural pit smell.

• Private (Close quarters)

If you are living in close quarters with the potential fagg, perhaps room-mates, or sharing a barracks or other common area in a business or residence, you have added opportunities for testing. Watch for guys that apologize after you’ve hurt them. You step on their foot in the hall and they say they’re sorry. You bump into them when you’re in a hurry and they say they’re sorry. While trying to make room for your own stuff on the desk you knock theirs on the floor and they say they’re sorry. The fagg is desperately afraid of offending you, since that would reduce the chance of it getting to touch you, smell you, or see you naked.

Leave the bathroom door open when using the toilet. A guy that likes to fuck will generally keep his distance, and tell you to “Close the fucking door and turn on the fan, asshole.” while the fagg will have trouble resisting your scent and whatever glimpses it can get of your body. If you leave it open when showering, it may even be unable to resist the idea that you’re actually trying to give it a show, and will probably end up playing with itself while you’re all wet. When you emerge, watch for puddles or streaks on the floor near the door of the bathroom, or the smell of spunk. Even if you can’t see any evidence, try saying “Christ, it smells like a whorehouse in here. Did you play with yourself?” If the dude is a man that likes to fuck, he’ll probably respond with “In your dreams, homo. If I dropped a load your pillow would be wet.” while the fagg will simply turn red and mutter, and maybe get that look like your dog used to when it pissed on the floor.

Cum is a weak spot for many faggs, and they have a real problem resisting it’s draw. One easy way to identify the fagg is to leave a cum rag laying near your bed, or a pair of dirty shorts that you’ve used to wipe up a load. It may be able to resist once or twice, but if you leave enough bait out, sooner or later it lose control. A particularly effective method is to blast a thick load in your dirty shorts and tell it you’re leaving for a couple of hours, then double back a moment later to see if has gone for the bait. Even if you can’t catch it in the act of sucking the jizz out of the cloth, there may be signs like blobs of fresh cum on it’s nose or lips.

If you have a potential fagg for a room-mate, next time you know it is coming home with a “friend,” or what you think is a “cover-girl,” try being naked when they walk in. A guy who likes to fuck will say something like “Dude! What the fuck?” while the fagg will apologize for not checking if it was ok to come in first. At the same time, keep a close eye on the other people. If the fagg’s friend or cover-girl starts drooling and moves away from the fagg to get closer to you, it’s a pretty good sign that the dude is a fagg. At that point, you can try putting the moves on the other person, and see if the fagg gets angry or excited. As an added bonus with this, you may get to fuck both the friend/cover-girl and the original fagg. If you succeed in this, you’ve struck gold, as faggs are terrific at spotting competition, and you can now send the fagg out to bring back other holes for you. As long as you continue to let it touch you enough that it thinks you care, it will bring you pussy for the rest of your life.

Start calling the potential fagg a stupid nickname when you’re alone and give it orders. Start easy, with things like “Hey, Pussy, grab me a beer.” If the dude is a man who likes to fuck, he’ll probably tell you to “Fuck off and get it yourself, princess.” In that case, you’ll need to back off and reconsider your approach, but if it just turns red and gets you the beer, you’re in solid. If it brings you back two, it’s desperate and hoping you’ll let it drink your piss later.

Check the potential fagg’s computer when it’s not around. If it’s password is your name, or whatever nickname you’ve been calling it, then it’s a fagg for sure.

If the potential fagg offers to do your laundry, there are a couple of things to watch for, rank clothes that take a few extra days to come back clean (it may have been hanging onto them for a few days to sniff and jerk off with at night) socks, underwear and jockstraps that look newer than they should mysteriously appearing in laundry (like they might be newly purchased to replace older items that “vanished”

If your toilet seat and/or the rim are cleaner than the rest of the bathroom it’s a good bet that you have a desperate fagg in the house that is seeking for the taste and smell of Man to satisfy its craving.

Shoes/boots that keep getting moved, or that are suddenly cleaner than normal, or have tongue marks on them, or that appear to have drool inside. There are few things that affect the fagg like Man smell, and used footwear is high on that list.

After being passed out from a night of heavy drinking, you wake up and your feet and toenails are cleaner than normal. The Fagg is incapable of refusing a chance to touch the parts of a Man that smell. Left by itself with an unconscious Man, it can’t resist cleaning his feet.

Try a little tease, something such as a compliment, by saying “You’re almost pretty enough to fuck.” At that point, a guy-who-likes-to-fuck will respond with something like “You should be so lucky, douche-bag, stick to paying for it.”, while the fagg will blush and mumble, and may start dressing more provocatively in hopes that it will actually become pretty enough for you to fuck, or, if it is in particularly bad shape, it may simply drop its pants and bend over on the spot.

There are also some external signs you can watch for, that are viewable when the fagg isn’t at hand. Watch for greasiness or stickiness on your broom handles, or the handles of such things as tennis rackets, golf clubs, and tools like hammers. If you are slow to spot the fagg, it may become so desperate to feel its holes filled that it will start fucking itself with otherwise innocuous household items in order to relieve its need. You have to be careful about letting such things go on too long. Aside from the danger of a fagg thinking that it can get along without a Man to fill it, there are all sorts of risks to your health from a fagg using household items and neglecting to sterilize them afterward..

As you get closer and closer to certainty about the fagg, there are ways to accelerate the vetting process. Because of the danger of triggering a fight with a man who likes to fuck, these need to be used carefully, and only when your level of certainty about the fagg is already quite high. They should be considered equivalent to a final meet and greet with a potential employee, after the fagg has passed all of the initial application and interview processess, primarily used for ensuring that the fagg is of sufficient auality to be worth letting it have your cock and cum. There are few things as wasteful as having to throw out a perfectly good fag because it is a poor match for you.

Try dropping your cumrag on its pillow, or holding it over the fag’s nose and mouth by surprise, preferably while damp, so that you can see if the fagg’s need for man is compatible with your particular pheromones. If it fights you off, it may give you trouble later. If it goes limp and gets a hard-on, you’re good. Just be careful not to stop it from breathing for too long. A dead room-mate, even if it’s just a fagg, will cause trouble.

When it’s walking by, grab it and throw it to the ground, pulling its face into your crotch. Consider the fit. Do you like the feel of its head between your thighs, or is it the wrong size. Too small a head can be overcome by squeezing your legs tighter, but if the fagg’s head is too big, and you will face mild discomfort from having it between your legs over-night, it’s probably not worth bothering.

An acid, final, test is to accidentally cum on it. When you have no real doubt its a fagg, arrange things so it can watch you  jerk off. While it’s watching you, stand up as though to get some fresh porn or something, and “accidentally” spray your load on its face. If you’ve made a gross error and it’s a Man, be prepared for a knock-down, drag-out fight that ends with one of you on the street or in the hospital. But if you’ve done it right, you should have it marked as yours for life. If you aren’t buried balls deep in its throat or gut within 24 hours, you’re doing it wrong.

The above article is parody and intended for humour and titillation, and is not intended to offer real advice. It is Copyright 2012 by Kevin Shea. Tumblr users are free to repost it on tumblr as long as they keep the entire article intact, including this disclaimer and notice of copyright. You are expressly forbidden from altering the article or presenting it as coming from another person, or publishing it anywhere other than a tumblr.com blog without specific permission. For any uses of this article, outside of tumblr reblogs, please contact me for permission at i.like.it.rough@gmail.com